Assess the situation. Only nine percent of women say that they found love in a bar. Is this great gal that you're checking out part of that nine percent? Here are some good signs:
Assess whether she is checking you out. Perhaps she's smiling or talking to her friends while looking at you. Many guys don't pursue in this situation because they don't believe what they are seeing or they are waiting for the girl to approach. Yes, she is checking you out and no, she will definitely not approach you. However, she will appreciate it if you send a drink or a plate of nachos her way with a few chuckles and smiles from you. Then go and own up and start talking.
Be careful if she is alone. This is a tough call. She may be waiting for someone. Possibly the girl of your dreams will make it obvious if she's waiting for someone by looking towards the door often. If this is the case, don't pursue. If not, well, she just isn't that insecure to be by herself and is most likely to appreciate a good chat, whether or not another guy is coming to meet her. Hey, what's to lose by at least trying?
Decide what it means if she is dressed provocatively. Women who are interested in meeting someone might wear bold, solid colors like black, white or red. They also typically put a lot of effort into their hair, makeup and shoe selection. Mind you, women often do this for women too, so don't make assumptions. Women don't like looking as if they've spent a day at the construction site when they go out to enjoy themselves. So shelve the assumptions and look lively. If her clothes give off signals, you have probably been drinking a little earlier than usual. Look for the woman in the clothes, not at the clothes on the woman.
Understand what is means if she is looking around a lot. If she's in her circle of friends and makes an effort to look at the guys passing by, you've got a potential pick-up. Mind you, you might have a group of women doing this all at once. Select the one that meets with your idea of fun and good talk. Use your commonsense. Sometimes you may be roped into engaging with all of them as they check you out for a friend in that group. Be obliging.
React quickly if she looks bored or annoyed with her company. The guys she came with are belligerent and touching her and she has no out. This is your best situation to be the knight in shining armor. You don't even need visual contact! Just walk over there and say, "How'd you like to come sit with me/us?" or "There's an empty seat next to me if you need it." You can skip down to the conversation part if you're lucky enough to find one of these. Ask her what on earth she was discussing with those bullish guys and get her a good stiff drink.
Make eye contact. You've already established that she is available, so keep telling yourself that. This next step is key. If she looks at you and you look away nervously, good luck to you. You've already made a bad first impression. Keep a relaxed, flirtatious gaze. Don't stare and don't lock up and look like a psycho. Also don't flash a huge, fake grin. Just move your head however feels natural and smile a bit--whatever feels natural. If she looks away shyly, that's good. If she gives you a seductive stare, that's even better. If she looks away and looks freaked out, better find someone else.
Look away for a second or two to give her time to think about you. She has noticed that you're available and that you like her. She's thinking about whether she likes you back. Don't take too long. Between ten seconds and a minute. Whatever feels right. Take a deep breath, relax, think happy thoughts. She was intrigued by you, remember?
Clear your mind. Breathe. That oxygen is going to help you think on your toes and help you relax. Gulp it down politely. She may wonder if you are a fish otherwise.
Glance over at her again. If she's chatting with her friends and still has her eye on you, congratulations. If she's looking at you comfortably, congratulations. If she purposely avoids eye contact, she either has myopia or she just hasn't felt the spark her end. Approach somebody else or offer to put her glasses back on.
Keep eye contact as you approach. Don't stare and don't trip over anything as you walk toward her. Stay relaxed and focused. Have a sense of purpose. Don't let all the people who are in your way discourage you. Remember, we have already established that she likes you. If you blow it now, it's all your fault. Although, never underestimate the endearing quality of a guy who trips over in pursuit of love. It can be retold for years afterwards and who knows, it may just end in marriage.
Smile casually and say something casual. Remember, you are a stranger. There is no need to say something elaborate but at least form the words clearly - don't mumble or spit in anticipation.
Relax let the words flow.... and take it from a pro.
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